During the holiday season, we have fond memories of our grandparents buying us that special doll or train set we wanted more than anything, baking spicy aromatic gingerbread men or frying the crispiest latkes. Long after our Nana or Pops is gone to the hereafter, we pull out the photo albums and get misty eyed as we remember their unconditional love.
We almost never think of our grandparents as coming from the Dark Side. But,poor Alix and Mikey. Their grandfather is Darth Vader reincarnated.
Their mom, Allison, and their dad, Damon, have been embroiled in a three- year- long divorce case which barely pales before the War of the Roses. Damon is in love with a wealthy three-time divorcee ten years older than him who likes to vaction in her condo at a nudist resort in Land O Lakes Florida.
Allison, for reasons only known to her, would like to stay married to creepy Damon, but he is enraptured by the nudist and her bank accounts which remain rock solid even in these financially shaky times.
Damon’s parents never liked Allison’s outspoken nature or her bi-racial background. They are thrilled with the older (100% WASP) wealthy divorcee and her bank accounts, though they are unaware of her nudist proclivities. They have hired their best friend, a pit bull attorney, to represent Damon, and Damon's dad has told his daughter in law more than once that he hopes to see her homeless and begging on the street one day so he can spit on her as he walks by her. A lovely thing to say to the mother of your grandchildren whose only crime is that she married into a disgusting, greedy, racist, spiteful family.
This Christmas, Damon, despite his children’s desire to stay at home with their mom, insisted that Alix and Mikey spend the holiday with him, the divorcee, and his family. Allison convinced the kids it wouldn’t be so bad. After all their aunt, uncle and cousin Maxie would be sleeping over at the grandparents’ too.
On Christmas morning, Alix, Mikey and Cousin Maxie woke up early and found envelopes from their grandparents. Alix and Mikey opened their envelopes and each found $25. Maxie opened his envelope and there was a check for $500. The grandfather said, “Max, show them the check. See Alix and Mike, Max has $500 and you only get $25.Why? Because you listen to your mother, and as long as you listen to her, you’ll get next to nothing from me”.
True story. Pinky Swear. What a loving family interaction on Christmas morning! Damon watched as the whole scene unrolled between his father and his children and then he presented his “finacee” with a huge emerald ring of his mother's--she never wanted Allison to have it. He then gave each of his kids a McDonald’s gift certificate.